13 Guilt-free Tips: How to get rid of Sentimental Clutter
Why holding on to sentimental clutter could be holding you back
You likely found your way here because you’re feeling overwhelmed by stuff, and things, and clutter, and memories …and guilt.
Maybe you’ve made real progress in other areas of your home, but you find yourself completely stuck when it comes to your memory box.
You’re not alone - I asked my regular readers if they struggled to declutter sentimental items, and over 75% said yes.
Is there a secret to letting go of sentimental things?
Can big softies like us really let go of sentimental items without feeling guilty?
Yes and yes!
Worried that you’re too sentimental?
Are you a sentimental fool? Yeah, me too *le sigh*
Strolling down memory lane is one of my favourite places to be!
I touch items that belonged to my Grandma and I’m immediately blanketed in nostalgia
I pick up little trinkets and smile remembering the story behind them
I just need to see the cover of my yearbook to regret that bowl haircut all over again
But the more life we live, the more physical memories we collect.
The more physical memories we have, the more we have to store …clean …tidy …organize ...dust.
Can minimalism and sentiment coexist?
I turned to minimalism as a way to minimize my mess and make life more manageable.
I thought that it meant that I’d have to get rid of all of my sentimental items.
The more I learned about minimalism, the more I realized that it’s all about prioritising what’s important to us.
So if sentimental items are important to you, they absolutely have a place in a minimalist home.
How long does is take to declutter sentimental items?
Decluttering sentimental things may be a bit slower than other categories, but I promise you that you’ll be feeling reassured, relieved, and raring to go by the time you finish reading this.
Let’s get on to my favourite tips for decluttering sentimental items:
13 Guilt-free Tips: How to get rid of Sentimental Clutter
1) Throw anything sentimental into a memory box
Throw anything remotely sentimental into a memory box.
Review the contents a few times a year
Keeping physical memories separate from your other belongings has so many benefits:
It makes tidying up quick and easy because you know where to put anything remotely sentimental (more tips to make tidying easier here)
It keeps your home free of clutter
You can take your time and enjoy reviewing the contents when it’s time to do so (rainy weekend afternoons were made for this!)
Grouping everything together makes reviewing items all at once so much easier.
You can easily tell which items genuinely pull at your heart strings, and which ones don’t (…maybe I don’t need to keep all of those touristy city maps?)
Remember, if everything is important, nothing is important.
2) If you don’t know what to do - do nothing
If you don’t know what to do, do nothing.
Give yourself time.
Forcing yourself to make a decision before you’re ready leads to regrets.
I get it, this one can be tough.
For an impulsive, impatient person like myself, the only thing worse than having to let go of my special things, is to do nothing at all.
I like taking action! Either putting it in the stay pile, or the go pile.
It feels counterintuitive to do nothing, but playing out the below examples reminds me that it’s the right thing to do.
I imagine these three examples, and how I would feel:
I force myself to let go of the item before I’m ready.
I have an uncomfortable feeling about the whole thing and end up regretting letting everything go and am filled with guilt.
I do not want to go through the process again and let my sentimental clutter build up and up.
I keep everything that I’m unsure of.
I feel like the whole afternoon was a waste and doubt I’ll do it again for several years.
I keep things I’m unsure about to one side.
I’m super gentle with myself & feel really good about what I let go of.
I put the things I’m unsure about back in the box and tell myself that I’m sure things will be more clear next time.
I may not physically be any further ahead than in example 2, but I’m in a completely different headspace - it’s been an enjoyable and productive afternoon that I’m excited to try again in a couple of months to stay on top of my sentimental clutter.
Give yourself the gift of time, celebrate your wins however small, and keep the experience positive so you’re more likely to do it again.
3) Take photos
I’m so forgetful - seeing nostalgic items unlocks memories in my brain that I’m pretty sure would be lost otherwise.
It’s often not the actual item we want to keep hold of, it’s the feeling and memories that it evokes.
For me, looking at a photo of the item is usually all I need for that hit of nostalgia.
Now that my phone automatically makes photo slideshows, I’m actually more likely to relive beautiful moments if I keep the memory as a digital photo!
So if you’re on the fence, take a snap of the item and see how you feel when you look at the photo.
Remember, your stuff isn’t the keeper of your memories, you are!
4) How does it make you feel?
How does the sentimental item actually make you feel? Guilty? Sad? Happy?
Be curious about your feelings, feel them, and validate them.
Our emotions are entwined with physical possessions at the best of times – even more so with sentimental items.
If you’re feeling stuck, writing about the item will make this exercise more powerful.
Here are some journal prompts if you’re not sure where to start:
When I look at this item I feel ____
The first time I saw this item was ____
My best memory that I associate with this item is ____
My worst memory that I associate with this item is ____
If I let go of this item, I’m worried that ____
You’d be surprised - once you’ve acknowledged and honoured your feelings, it’s often much easier for you to decide what to do with your sentimental item.
My cringey discovery from journaling about sentimental clutter
I used to find it really difficult to declutter any sentimental items that reminded me of past romantic relationships.
I wasn’t holding on to feelings for any of my exes, so I couldn’t work out why it was so difficult to let go of my sentimental clutter.
When I dug deeper I realized that it came from a negative core belief that I was unlovable.
Thanks to therapy, sobriety and lots of self work, I don’t believe that any more.
As soon as I understood that I had been keeping these items as evidence that I was lovable, I was able to let go of it all.
5) Would someone you know LOVE to have it?
Sentimental items can often hold sentimental value for more than one person.
If you’re ready to let go, and you think that the other person would love to have it, reach out to them to check.
Be prepared for them to say no, and to be ok with that! Offloading sentimental clutter is not the aim of the game here :)
But, if they’re stoked to take it off of your hands, it may feel a lot easier for you to say farewell.
6) Would someone else benefit from it?
Would your childhood toys make a family really happy if they found them at the thrift store?
I love imagining someone’s face when they find a treasure that I’ve donated!
It always makes letting go of sentimental items feel a bit more positive.
7) Put a pin it in
Is it all feeling too much? Is there too much to go through in one session?
Put a pin in it - your sentimental clutter isn’t going anywhere!
Don’t force it and burn yourself out - take a step back.
You can revisit another time.
You’re better off going through things when you’re in the right headspace.
8) You’re not obliged to keep gifts
You are not obliged to keep gifts.
I’m giving you permission to let go of gifts that you don’t use or love.
I know you just want to make them happy by keeping their gift, but hiding it at the back of a cupboard is not making anyone happy.
I have loads more tips on what to say and do when you receive unwanted gifts here
9) Do you need to keep all of it?
Is this sentimental item part of a set?
Maybe you could just keep an item or two, e.g:
Your favourite tea cup from a set
Your favourite five pieces of art from your kid’s year at school
Your favourite ten records from your Dad’s extensive collection
10) Would you regret letting go of this if the person associated with the item passed away?
Is this one a tad morbid? Yes. Is it the one I use the most? Yes.
The idea is to ask yourself if you would regret letting go of this if the person associated with the item passed away…?
We want to find the perfect balance of minimizing mess and minimizing regrets.
When the unthinkable happened, and we lost my Mum, I was grateful that I’d been decluttering sentimental items with this mindset for years.
It had helped me let go of clutter, but hold on to items with lots of meaning.
11) Would you want your loved ones to feel obliged to hold on to all of your belongings?
Now flip it around: if you had passed, would you want your loved ones to feel like holding on to physical possessions was the only way they could stay connected to you?
This one always snaps me out of a guilt trip pretty quickly - my Grandma would laugh her arse off if she knew how tortured I was over whether to keep her tea towels or not!
12) Don’t “should” all over yourself
We all have different levels of sentimentality.
Don’t get caught up in any “shoulds”.
“I should keep it”
“I should be ready to let this go”
“I should be less sensitive”
“I should keep this set of china because Grandma loved it”
If you want to keep it, keep it.
If you don’t want to keep it, don’t keep it.
“Shoulds” are unhelpful.
13) If you love it - keep it & if you do keep it - love it!
If you love it - keep it!
If you keep it - use it!
Love it and use it!
Honour Grandma’s favourite china by using it and thinking of her every day
Frame that doodle you did years ago that you’re actually really proud of
Put those itty bitty booties into a shadow box
Start a tradition to go though the box of your Mum’s memories every year on her birthday
FAQs
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Sentimental clutter can be challenging to let go of because it is often associated with memories and emotions:
Nostalgia: Sentimental items can take us back in time and remind us of significant moments in our lives. It's natural to want to hold onto these items as a way to preserve those memories.
Guilt: We may feel guilty about getting rid of sentimental items, especially if they were given to us by someone we care about. We may worry that we'll hurt their feelings if we let go of these items.
Fear of forgetting: We may worry that if we get rid of sentimental items, we'll forget the memories that are associated with them. Holding onto these items can be a way to keep those memories fresh in our minds.
Uncertainty about the future: We may hold onto sentimental items because we're not sure what the future holds. We may worry that we'll regret getting rid of these items if our circumstances change.
Despite these challenges, it's important to remember that letting go of sentimental clutter can be liberating.
It can free up physical and mental space, making room for new experiences and memories.
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There are several alternative ways to preserve sentimental memories without keeping physical items:
Create a digital scrapbook: Use online tools or apps to create a digital scrapbook that includes pictures, videos, and other mementos. You can easily access and share your digital scrapbook with friends and family.
Write a journal or family blog: Writing down your memories, thoughts, and feelings is a great way to preserve them. You can keep a personal journal or start a blog to share your experiences with others.
Record a video or audio message: Use your phone or camera to record a video or audio message that captures your thoughts and feelings. This is a great way to preserve memories and share them with loved ones.
Create a memory garden: If you enjoy gardening, consider creating a memory garden that includes plants or flowers that remind you of special moments. You can also add special stones or other decorations to personalize your garden.
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Here are some tips that can help prevent accumulating more sentimental clutter in the future:
Digitize sentimental items such as photos, letters, and cards. You can store them on a computer or in the cloud.
Consider creating a scrapbook for your most important sentimental items. This will limit the amount of space they take up and allow you to be intentional and focus on the most meaningful items.
Set limits on the amount of sentimental items you keep. For example, you could decide to only keep what can fit into a memory box
Before acquiring new sentimental items, ask yourself if it truly holds value and if you have the space to store it.
By being intentional with what you keep and how you store it, you can prevent it from accumulating in the future.
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This post will show you what to do with items that you’re ready to let go of
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It's understandable that you may want some support and guidance during this time.
Involving family members or friends in the process can be helpful in several ways:
They can provide emotional support and encouragement as you make difficult decisions.
They may offer a fresh perspective on items that you may be unsure about keeping.
They can help you physically sort and organize items, making the process more efficient.
However, it's important to consider the potential drawbacks of involving others in this process. Some things to keep in mind include:
Family members or friends may have their own emotional attachments to certain items, which could cloud their judgment.
You may feel pressure to keep items that you don't want to because of others' opinions.
Going through sentimental items can be really draining, and you may be less inclined to take breaks with others there
If there are disagreements about what to keep or let go of, it could lead to tension or conflict.
Ultimately, the decision to involve others in the process of decluttering sentimental items is a personal one.
Consider your own needs and feelings, as well as the dynamics of your relationships with others, before making a decision.
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Repurposing sentimental items can be a great way to preserve the memories they hold while also creating something new and useful. Here are some ideas to get you started:
Turn old t-shirts or blankets into a quilt or throw pillow covers
Use vintage family photos to create a personalized photo album or digital scrapbook
Transform old jewelry into new pieces or use the beads to make a unique piece of artwork
Use old recipe cards to create a personalized digital cookbook or recipe box
Turn children's artwork into a collage, use it to decorate a plain storage box, or create a digital gallery.
By repurposing sentimental items, you can give them new life while still preserving the memories they hold.
Get creative and see what unique ideas you can come up with!
Conclusion
Now you know my secrets to letting go of sentimental things without feeling guilty!
If you are feeling overwhelmed by clutter in general and need a helping hand, I have a free 60 day challenge to help you:
You’ve got this!
Release your guilt & celebrate your memories :)
